


The 349.99$ Zeer-Moeilijk-Om-Tafel-Te-Bouwen

by ribbonista



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: IKEA Furniture, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-04 18:43:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12174504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ribbonista/pseuds/ribbonista
Summary: Otacon and Solid Snake build some Ikea furniture.





	The 349.99$ Zeer-Moeilijk-Om-Tafel-Te-Bouwen

**Author's Note:**

> it's a table to surpass metal gear

“Can you pass me that allen key?” Otacon asked, gesturing vaguely over at an assortment of little metal L's. But when Snake peered to the pile, Otacon had already turned back to the peach-colored wooden leg of the table they were trying to build- he didn't catch exactly which allen key Otacon had wanted in the first place.

He breezed his fingers over the pile of keys with hesitation, before Otacon asked once more- “Snake? The allen key?” 

Snake took the first one he saw- a tiny, delicate key they weren't entire sure was needed with the table in the first place. Otacon clicked his tongue- “No, Snake... not that one. The other one.”

“Otacon. There's a _lot_ of other ones.” Snake grunted, giving hard blue eyes towards the engineer. Otacon, he thought, should be far more proactive about this considering his background with making far more complicated things than Ikea tables.

Hal sighed and shook his head, reaching over across Snake's lap to reach for the key. Their faces inches apart with Otacon's stretch was tantalizingly close, and Snake simply couldn't let the opportunity go. He dipped his head and gently kissed the younger man sweetly on the lips, and the reaction was almost immediate. Otacon's face flushed, but a smile curled at his lips. Putting his hand down onto the carpet to give himself a little leverage- to make sure he didn't collapse- the two men smooched softly for a few tender moments, before Otacon burst into shy, embarrassed giggles.

“Okay- okay-” He tried to say between kisses, but not _really_ trying to pull away. “We need to- Snake- to finish the table- hey- okay!”

The engineer finally drew back, looking pleased as punch, and straightened and fixed his hair a little, glowing in the cheeks. He turned and went for the allen key he had been searching for and firmly placed the table leg on Snake's lap. “Keep that safe,” He requested with the barest hints of a playful smile. “I need to put in these glass panes.”

The coffee table was still in shambles around them, pieces looking like they didn't belong in this _universe_ let alone the large cardboard box it had come in. There was glass panes; screws and nails; too many legs to count. The surface of the table was a creamy peach color that the two partners figured would look nice accompanying the rest of the bland furniture of their Philanthropy base.

Snake watched as his boyfriend began to use the allen key to click two pieces together, and he grunted- when Otacon heard the noise, he turned to look. “What? Is something wrong?”

“Are you sure those pieces go together?”

There was a pause, with Otacon looking between the two pieces of the table attached together, and the super soldier sat comfortably before him. “What, you don't think they do?”

“...well...”

A sigh of annoyance, and the turning of the allen key the _other_ direction. “Okay, Snake. If you're so smart, what piece attaches to this one?”

“Don't know.”

The sigh of annoyance turned into a gasp of playful faux offense. “Then you can't criticize me, Snake...!”

“Why don't we look for the instructions?”

 

There was another long pause as they both realized that was something neither of them had thought of in the first place, and a silence as their eyes scowered silently along the floor for the discarded instructions. Then, quite suddenly, the both of them bolted, beginning to scuttle about the room for the pieces of paper- Snake to prove Otacon's pieces didn't fit together and Otacon to prove Snake wrong.

A silent battle of eye-searching prowess ensued as the sound of scuffling resounded, before a triumphant “Aha!” rung out. The younger engineer stood, papers crinkled and clasped tightly in his fist, looking at Snake proudly. The soldier stared at his partner only in silence, accepting his fate.

Unfolding the sheets, Otacon read through them quickly, and with a hot flush to his face, discarded them with a toss onto the floor. “Okay, well, who needs instructions anyways...?”

Snake couldn't help but laugh, meandering over to his shorter boyfriend and embracing him in a loose, affectionate hug. Hugging back, the engineer buried his face into Snake's chest with a grumbly noise. “It's fine.” Snake said, resting his chin on Otacon's head. “Not even Metal Gear is as complicated as this table.”

Otacon turned his head up, eyebrows knit. “Snake... what are you saying?” He scolded almost poutily. “Metal Gear is infinitely more complicated than a piece of Ikea furniture. It's got millions of components that, if even _slightly_ altered, could render the entire machine void!”

Snake only looked at him blankly, quirking a single eyebrow, and once more, Otacon's cheeks flushed hot with embarrassment at his dump of info. “R-right... well, Metal Gear is besides the point. We should really get back to making this table...” 

Sitting back down, Otacon grabbed the discarded instructions and turned back to the myriad of pieces assorted across the floor of their room. David sat comfortably down next to him, putting once more the pale leg of the table into his lap- for safe keeping, after all.

“You know...”

“Mm? What is it, Snake?”

“We could always forego the table and just kiss.”

“S-Snake! We shelled out all that money on this thing! It definitely has to be built.”

David sighed, leaning back on one of his hands and using the other to brush his hand through his short cropped brown hair. “If you say so...” He murmured, almost sounding defeated and peering over at Otacon with despondent blue eyes.

Otacon hesitated, trying to slot two pieces of wood that the instructions were vague about, before throwing them onto the floor and crawling over. “Fine, fine. Just a few kisses, though, and then we really have to finish this table!”

As he pressed his lips against Snake's own, sitting comfortably next to the soldier, Dave raised a hand and delicately held the cheek of the engineer. He gently brushed the pad of his thumb against Otacon's cheekbone, eliciting a pleased noise from the younger man.

They sat like that, comfortable there, intimate, for a few moments, kissing softly, before Otacon pulled away with a determined look. “Okay, okay, the table, Snake. We've really gotta focus...!”

Dave shrugged, looking happy with their small smooching excursion, before slowly handing Otacon the same abandoned allen key Otacon had asked for the in the first place- and used to attach the pieces that had no business fitting together.

“Sn-Snake...!!”


End file.
